|The story below is originally published on Mainichi Daily News by Mainichi Shinbun (http://mdn.mainichi.jp).|
|They admitted inventing its kinky features, or rather deliberately mistranslating them from the original gossip magazine.|
|In fact, this is far from the general Japanese' behavior or sense of worth.|
Where have all the macho Japanese men disappeared to?
It all started about five years ago when the growing number of young men who didn't mind serving as chauffeurs for women they admired but couldn't attract gave birth to a new word,asshii(driving only).
Now there are mitsugu-kun.femio and tsukibito-kun,referring to men who offer financial contributions to women they worship,put on unisex clothes and carry their girlfriends'hand-bags,respectively.
These are all different manifestations of the same trend--Japanese men are increasingly drifting away from the traditional ideal of masculinity.
Spa! believes that Japanese men have contracted an illness called yasashii-byo(gentleness disease).
The magazine bases the 10-page report on an original survey on an unspecified number of men in their 20s and 30s.
According to Spa!,most guys suffering from yasashii-byo show one of the two major symptoms--narcissism and perseverance.
The first type agree to everything domineering women demand.
They do so because self-sacrifice gives them pleasure and satisfaction.
Mr.A is a good example.
According to Spa!, the 30-year-old company employee feels the happiest when he is with a woman who has continuously treated him coldly,but comes to him whenever her relationship with another man sours,"For her,I'm someone who is always there to take her out for a drive when she feels terrible because of her problems with her boyfriend." explains Mr.A.
"I spent 3 million yen on a new car just for that purpose.
I thoroughly research our destination before going anywhere with her.
When we arrive,we check into separate hotel rooms.
But it's OK,sex is a hassle."
Narcissists are obsessed with broad-mindedness.
Mr.B,a 32-year-old thinktank worker tells Spa! he took seven days off from work to serve as a voluntary mediator for his former girlfriend and her allegedly unfaithful husband.
"My reputation at work suffered."says Mr.B,"but I freed myself from a lingering sense of guilt for not accepting her self-indulgence."
The second type cling to the notion of doing something beneficial for women they love and idolize.
Mr.C,29,is hopelessly crazy about Miss K.a woman he met 16 years ago.
Spa! says he never tried to approach her and ignores her loose reputation.
Mr.C believes that she must be grateful for his willingness to lend an ear to her problems around the clock.
Mr.D may be even harder to understand.
Spa! says the 32-year-old is waiting for Miss R,a woman who walked out on him 18 months ago,to come back,like she did three times in the last six years.
"Well,it makes me angry."
Mr.D admits,"but when she falls in love with somebody else,she can't listen to me.
After all,it might be my fault."
Mr.D always allowed Miss R to pursue new romance,but was always there to pick up the pieces when the relationship broke up.
Mr.D relates to Spa! his belief in "unconditional love."
In concluding,Spa! likens these men,who are extremely convenient for egotistic,manipulative women, to teen-age girls who are in love with the concept of romantic love--they are expecting too much and doing too little.(TI)